Young Galahad

Worse than Kissing Your Sister

The RF Engineer: The Geek of Geeks

If God were an Engineer…

A bunch of engineers are sitting around at a party, discussing the nature of the God, and who designed women.

The mechanical engineer begins, “God must be a mechanical engineer because if you look at all the pulleys and levers that drive the body and how the tendons, muscles, and bones all work together, well, it’s just amazing.”

The chemical engineer then retorts, “No way! God has to be a chemical engineer because if you look at all the chemical processes that drive the body, how the hormones and the brain and the glands and everything else all interact, well, it’s just astounding.”

The electrical engineer says, “I disagree. God has to be an electrical engineer because if you look at the circuitry of the body, how the thousands upon millions of nerve cells transmit signals from one part to another, well, it’s mind boggling.”

The civil engineer speaks up last and says, “No, you’re all wrong: God is definitely a civil engineer.

The other three ask “Why?” in unison.

“Because only a civil engineer would run a sewer through a playground.”

This joke illustrates the unspoken rivalry and hierarchy existing in the engineering world. When I was in college in the eighties, Civil Engineering was the least respected of the engineering disciplines followed by Mechanical Engineering and Electrical Engineering was at the top. Civil Engineers built the targets for the mechanical engineer’s weapons that are guided by the electronics of Electrical Engineers. (Sadly in the Civil Engineers’ defense, nobody mentions the budget constraints they have to deal with). Perhaps the Civil and Mechanical Engineers were considered “blue collar” because their work involved working with their hands in cement or machines. EEs were the geeks with the most gravitas because they worked with their brains.

Now that I’m working for a chip maker there is even a hierarchy among the types of Electrical Engineers. At the bottom of the electrical engineering hierarchy are the digital design Engineers probably only because of their vast numbers. DSP engineers are a dime a dozen because engineering universities offer tons of courses on digital design and churn out hundreds of digital design engineers. Analog chip design engineers are next in the hierarchy because there are fewer of them and they have to design chips that deal with the fickle analog signal world. Remember Analog electronics are those electronic systems with a continuously variable signal including sound, light, temperature, position, or pressure. It is more difficult to design in the analog realm because of these fickle variable signals. However, the acknowledged Geeks of the Geeks are the RF Engineers.

RF design is hard. RF design engineers have to design in lower frequency ranges than other analog engineers. When designing an RF circuit in lower frequency ranges, weird things happen when connecting a radio signal chip to chip. Parts of the circuit can behave like antennae which can cause all sorts of interference. This is one reason why RF design often involves chip sets.

So the next time you meet an RF Design Engineer, don’t just call him a geek; give him the respect he deserves. Call him by his true title: the Geek of Geeks.

Discovery for Laymen – Accelerometers

The Locker Room

One of the best things about playing hockey is the locker room conversation before and after the game.  Here’s a sample of the kind of locker room banter we experience every week. 

Fuji: Mawnin’
Me: Mornin’
Fuji: Didja see the Bruins’ game last night?
Me: Yeah, wasn’t Thomas amazing?
Fuji:  I couldn’t believe that kick save when he robbed Ovechkin.
Me:  What’s wrong with the Bruins this year? They’re not losing…
Fuji:  Isn’t it a great time to be in Boston?
Me: You got that right, I wish the Patriots had done better this year though…
Fuji Hey weya is everybody? Weya’s Bruce? Everybody’s late…
Me: Bruce is late.
Fuji: Eitha ya wanna play owa ya doan wanna play.
Jay: Mahnin’, weya is everybody? Weya’s UCONN?
Me: You mean Joe?
Jay: Yeah, UCONN.
Fuji: Whaddabout “Stickbag?”
Jay: Who knows, haven’t seen Italy in months. What happened to Italy?
Me: You mean Andy. I don’t know, but I should email him. He works with Stan.
Fuji: Oh, Italy works with you guys?
Me: You guys have a nickname for everyone. What’s my nickname?
Fuji and Jay: “Douchebag.”
Me: Ouch!
Fuji:Ya set yahself up fah that one.

I can never remember all the funny lines and sometimes I’m tempted to bring a tape recorder to the locker room.

 

 

The Man Who Didn’t Look at the Puck

Today was one of those days.    The mashed potato snow started falling around midnight last night.   While looking for the shovel in the tool shed, I bent down to unhinge the tool shed door and hit my forehead on the snowblower handle.  

It was lucky, waking up at 4:30.  It took longer to find the shovel than it took to clear two inches of snow from the driveway.  The drive to Woburn took an extra 10 minutes because the back roads weren’t cleared so driving slowly is a necessity.  Thankfully two extra bodies were on the bench, very good considering the winter mess outside.  New England snow storms sometimes present a challenge – what with the thick piles of slush that separate lanes and the same slush that’s kicked up into the windshield by big trucks.  It’s scary when suddenly an 18- wheeler throws a slush bomb that completely covers your windshield for what seems like a full minute.

I hadn’t seen him in about two years.  The guy is small, wears black pants, socks, jersey and a helmet without any mask or shield.  It’s almost eerie, when he has the puck, he almost never looks at it.  His eyes are constantly scanning the ice looking for an opening or a line of fire for either a pass or a quick wrist shot that will laser effortlessly through a hole in the goal keeper’s pads.  He’s never in a hurry unless he wants to be; his agile finesse and soft hands enable him skate around us like pilons on a race course. 

We think we should take the body, but we can’t even catch him to try that tactic.  Even his eyes don’t belie his intentions.  He’s in complete command: a general in control of his troops.  Amazingly the score is only 8 – 5, but he probably had something to do with that too.  He brings our game up to a higher level and we’re all sucking wind.  He is what we all aspire to be: the ultimate hockey player who can skate like most people walk, skip, and run; the stick is an extension of his arms and hands.  When he has the puck, he’s literaly playing with us.  The operative word here is playing.  He has all the time in the world to improvise and watch for opportunities to pass and score.  He’s a wise hunter at his prime with his spear at the ready.  He draws his stick back, feints a shot, then passes with pinpoint accuracy to a teammate with a better angle in front of the net.

Suddenly I’m skating on a rare breakaway and my wingmen are with me.  It’s a 3 on 2 and I’m scanning my opportunities to either skate around one of the defensemen or chip a pass over the defenseman’s stick to one of my wings.  It’s over in two seconds…With a burst of speed he flies up the ice behind me, positions himself and his stick under my stick and torso, lifts my stick and steals the puck away and turns the play back to our end in a milisecond before I can decide what I’m going to do with the puck.

Ice Hockey in Woburn

Ice Hockey

One of my passions in life is playing ice hockey.  I didn’t start skating until I was around 8 years old and I didn’t start playing hockey competitively until after I graduated from college.  I started skating when a swamp on Oaks Farm in Wilbraham, Massachusetts froze in winter.  My father gave me a pair of Bobby Orr Rally Skates and stick.  One of my clearest memories is skating on this swamp in the middle of winter on a clear, crisp, moonlit night when the ice was a smooth as glass.  I remember practicing skating forward and backwards and trying to cross over.  On this night there was a point when I could carve the ice with my edges and that was the turning point when I really started to enjoy skating. 

In ice hockey one must master so many different skills that it’s a game that you could spend your life chasing a variety of goals and still not accomplish all of them.  The most basic skill in ice hockey is skating.  If you can skate well, the other skills will be icing on the cake.  Other skills in hockey are passing, shooting, positioning, and stick-handling.

I try to focus on improving a few skills each season.  For example, one season I devoted practically the entire time making sure to move my feet and to pause for a millisecond to look before passing.  Another season I tried to get myself in shape so that I could skate to my fastest potential.  This year I’m trying to learn not to look directly at the puck when I’m stick-handling.  There are some great websites that give great drills to help you develop these skills.  One I refer to often is USA Hockey.

On Wednesday mornings I start my ritual in the dark.  I tap the off button on the alarm clock one or two minutes before it sounds at around 4:54 AM.  My hockey bag is already packed and waiting by the door with my sticks, water bottles, and first-aid kit.

93 South is fairly congested with traffic even at 5:20 AM.  It moves at 70 miles per hour.  The trip to Ned O’Brien Rink takes 25 minutes and we’re usually in the locker room by 5:35 getting dressed.  “Fuji” is one of our goalies and he runs the skate.  He’s famous for saying, “Hey, hurry up, we start at 6,” and “Either you wanna play or you don’t wanna play.”  Ned O’Brien Rink has the best ice in the Boston area, maybe on the east coast.  People in Woburn take pride in their hockey and Ned O’Brien’s ice is meticulously maintained.  The ice is always hard and smooth even in the corners.  We all usually warm up the goalies and start the informal scrimmage at around 6:15.  Most of us wear either a white or dark jersey.  Sometimes Fuji adjusts the teams to keep the games close.  Most of us are over 40 and Bruce is 63 years old.  He’s my inspiration to keep playing even though I’m probably slowing down every year.  I hope I can make up for my lack of speed with skillful passing.

Electrical Circuits – Discovery for Laymen

Electrical Circuits – Discovery for Laymen

The purpose of this blog is to bridge the gap between Electrical Engineers’ explanations and laymen’s understanding of electrical circuits.  I want to gain a working knowledge of electrical engineering and integrated circuits.  There’s a growing gap between what the common man understands and the speed at which technology is advancing.  I respectfully submit that no matter how hard they try, many very brilliant electrical engineers have a difficult time explaining electrical circuits to laymen like me.  So here is my humble attempt to find, understand, and share knowledge of electronic circuits.

First some definitions: 

Analog – All signals that humans can hear, see, or feel, including, sound, light, temperature, pressure, current or voltage, and current are called ‘analog signals.’  As long as we humans don’t evolve into a race of Cyborgs with computers for brains, there will exist the need for digital to analog conversion.  In electronic circuits: analog voltages and currents are analogous (similar to) to the real-world signals that they represent.  

Digital – Digital signals are approximations of analog signals.  They are quantized in time and amplitude, and are represented by discrete numbers (digits), by ones and zeroes. 

Analog Versus Digital

Digital in the News, but Analog is NOT Dead! 

Recently we are barraged daily with ads insisting that everything is, “going digital.”  That statement conveniently omits an important fact: with the advent of electronics going digital, there is just as much need for those signals to be converted back to the analog.  All signals that humans can hear, see, or feel, including, sound, light, temperature, pressure, current or voltage, and current are analog.  As long as we humans don’t evolve into a race of Cyborgs with computers for brains, there will exist the need for digital to analog conversion.